Is my all-day sickness back??!

Overnight on Saturday, I got violently ill. It has been a LONG time since I've felt that sick during this pregnancy. I am hoping (Fingers crossed!) that this is just some sort of bug and not an indication that my "morning" (read: all day) sickness from the first 17 weeks is back.

I spent much of yesterday and this morning in bed and feel somewhat better. At least I can keep some food down now and no longer have a shooting headache.

I do have two of the best nurses in the world -- my hubby and Dexter the dog.

We got (hopefully!) our LAST snow of this never-ending winter in the DC region this weekend, so a little sunshine and warmth will certainly do me good as well.

Baby Boy L continues to have a party in the womb regardless -- punching and kicking away! It's always a sweet indication that I am not alone and that communication and bonding with my baby has already begun in the womb. SO precious!!

Into the third trimester!

Why hello, third trimester! Nice to finally meet you!!!

#27weeks #timeisflying #babyboy #babybump #babylove #babylovespunchingandkickingmeallday

Mmmmmm.....

Sure sign you are 27 weeks pregnant:

You are behind an Entenmann's truck all the way to work and can't stop fantasizing about the delicious cheese danish pictured on the back. Mmmmmm......danish......

More ice cream?

My baby, courtesy of the awesome  wee mail app, is telling me this today:

My kicking is just a gentle reminder that I COULD USE MORE ICE CREAM DOWN HERE!

Hmmmm....that's a good thought, except for the fact that my lactose intolerance has decided to come back with a vengeance. Nooo! I was getting away with eating lots of great dairy up to this point in the pregnancy too.

I guess I just have to ask myself whether the possible aftermath of eating some delicious dairy is worth it. Decisions, decisions!!

Love a great bargain!

Really loving my Ju Ju Be designer diaper bag I bought used for a great price and in great condition!

My newest addiction = Facebook online yard sales! In the past few weeks, I have found our jogging stroller, big beach bag, two Adirondack outdoor chairs, and this diaper bag! Yes, this is bad, but the deals are sooooo good!

I think Baby Boy L is already proud of his bargain-hunting mommy!!

Wee mail from today...

Baby says:

Sorry I keep kicking you. It's like a Delta flight in here.

Very timely! He hasn't stopped kicking and punching today. Now my lower back is kiling me. Ahhhh!!

Highchair assembled!

Preparing for an important future dinner guest. #babyboy #babyprep #vipdinnerguest

Decals are done!

One benefit to the 10 snow days we've had this neverending winter?! Lots of baby prep and nursery productivity!

The nursery is just about done, and we finally finished placing all of the decals. Here are some pics!

Yay for a baby zoo animal theme!!

Decals are done!

One benefit to the 10 snow days we've had this neverending winter?! Lots of baby prep and nursery productivity!

The nursery is just about done, and we finally finished placing all of the decals. Here are some pics!

Yay for a baby zoo animal theme!!

Feeling so blessed!

Well, my awesome college roommates certainly surprised me in Rochester this weekend with my first baby shower! I came downstairs this AM in my workout gear ready to go walking only to find everyone standing around an amazing breakfast with gifts and photos galore! I was beyond shocked, and I am usually a VERY hard person to surprise!

What followed, after I got changed and freshened up, was a wonderful morning full of delicious food, fun games, great company, and thoughtful gifts for Baby Boy L! I even got to see two additional sorority sisters from college who live in the area. What a truly wonderful surprise!!

BBL and I feel sooo loved, grateful, and blessed!!

Here are some of my fave pics from the day:

Baby says...

"Don't worry about the nursery, mom, I'll be attached to you 24-7. Seriously, 24-7. Especially  from 3 to 6am."

25 weeks!!

Celebrating 25 weeks with my bump and BBL! Happy Pi Day and World Sleep Day too!! 

#babybump #babyboy #babylove #25weeks #readytofly #almostthirdtrimester #kickinglikecrazy

Jogging stroller -- check!

Bought an awesome used jogging stroller cheaply today! Can't wait to use it with our little guy!

#futurerunningmommy #babyboy #runningwithbaby #lovegreatdeals

Funny message from the womb...

...from yesterday's wee mail!

"So far I'm the only protestor at Occupy My Mom's Womb. So far."

Gotta love a witty fetus! :)

Progress in the nursery continues!

We even started putting up decals on the walls yesterday. I will post new pics when they are done!

Yay for our baby zoo animal theme!

6 months along!

24 weeks (AKA: 6 months and Baby Boy L is now officially viable)! Don't come out for at least another three months, though, little guy! 

#babyboy #babybump #babylove #babyprep #24weeks #lastweekofsecondtrimester #notfeelinghugeyet #feelingood #preggers 

For the bad days ahead....

One of my good friends, a new mom, recently shared this article with me. How touching and poignant! I will definitely save it for the more challenging days ahead as a new mom...

Full link available at: https://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/

2011 LESSON #2 : DON’T CARPE DIEM

Jan042012

 

Every time I’m out with my kids – this seems to happen:

An older woman stops us, puts her hand over her heart and says something like, “Oh- Enjoy every moment. This time goes by so fast.”

Everywhere I go, someone is telling me to seize the moment, raise my awareness, be happy, enjoyevery second, etc, etc, etc.

I know that this message is right and good. But as 2011 closes, I have finally allowed myself to admit that it just doesn’t work for me. It bugs me. This CARPE DIEM message makes me paranoid and panicky. Especially during this phase of my life – while I’m raising young kids. Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I’m not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I’m doing something wrong.

I think parenting young children (and old ones, I’ve heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they’ve heard there’s magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it’s hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that  most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.

And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers – “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU’LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN’T!” TRUST US!! IT’LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!”  - those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.

Now. I’m not suggesting that the sweet old ladies who tell me to ENJOY MYSELF be thrown from a mountain. These are wonderful ladies. Monkees, probably. But last week, a woman approached me in the Target line and said the following: “Sugar, I hope you are enjoying this. I loved every single second of parenting my two girls. Every single moment. These days go by so fast.”

At that particular moment, Amma had swiped a bra from the cart and arranged  it over her sweater, while sucking a lollipop undoubtedly found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feathers stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras. A losing contestant. I couldn’t find Chase anywhere, and Tish was sucking the pen from the credit card machine  WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, “Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you.”

That’s not exactly what I wanted to say, though.

There was a famous writer who, when asked if she loved writing, replied, “No. but I love having written.” What I wanted to say to this sweet woman was, “Are you sure? Are you sure you don’t mean you lovehaving parented?”

I love having written. And I love having parented. My favorite part of each day is when the kids are put to sleep (to bed) and Craig and I sink into the couch to watch some quality TV, like Celebrity Wife Swap, and congratulate each other on a job well done. Or a job done, at least.

Every time I write a post like this, I get emails suggesting that I’m being negative. I have received this particular message four or five times – G, if you can’t handle the three you have, why do you want a fourth?

That one always stings, and I don’t think it’s quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it’s hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she’s not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn’t add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it’s so hard means she IS doing it right…in her own way…and she happens to be honest.

Craig is a software salesman. It’s a hard job in this economy. And he comes home each day and talks a little bit about how hard it is. And I don’t ever feel the need to suggest that he’s not doing it right, or that he’s negative for noticing that it’s hard, or that maybe he shouldn’t even consider taking on more responsibility. And I doubt anybody comes by his office to make sure he’s ENJOYING HIMSELF. I doubt his boss peeks in his office and says: “This career stuff…it goes  so fast…ARE YOU ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT IN THERE, CRAIG???? THE FISCAL YEAR FLIES BY!! CARPE DIEM, CRAIG!”

My point is this. I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn’t enjoying it enough. Double failure.  I felt guilty because I wasn’t in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn’t MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I’d wake up and the kids would be gone, and I’d be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.

But the fact remains that I will be that nostalgic lady. I just hope to be one with a clear memory. And here’s what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line:

 “It’s helluva hard, isn’t it? You’re a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She’s my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime.” And hopefully, every once in a while, I’ll add- “Let me pick up that grocery bill for ya, sister. Go put those kids in the van and pull on up- I’ll have them bring your groceries out.”

Anyway. Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn’t work for me. I can’t even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.

Here’s what does work for me:

There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It’s regular time, it’s one minute at a time, it’s staring down the clock till bedtime time, it’s ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it’s four screaming minutes in time out time, it’s two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.

Then there’s Kairos time. Kairos is God’s time. It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. Kairos is those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day, and I cherish them.

Like when I actually stop what I’m doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is.  I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can’t hear her because all I can think is – This is the first time I’ve really seen Tish all day, and my God – she is sobeautiful. Kairos.

Like when I’m stuck in chronos time in the grocery line and I’m haggard and annoyed and angry at the slow check-out clerk. And then I look at my cart and I’m transported out of chronos. And suddenly I notice the piles of healthy food I’ll feed my children to grow their bodies and minds and I remember that most of the world’s mamas would kill for this opportunity. This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay. And I just stare at my cart. At the abundance. The bounty. Thank you, God. Kairos.

Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with Theo asleep at my feet and Craig asleep by my side and I listen to  them both breathing. And for a moment, I think- how did a girl like me get so lucky? To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth? Kairos.

These kairos moments leave as fast as they come- but I mark them. I say the word kairos in my head each time I leave chronos. And at the end of the day, I don’t remember exactly what my kairos moments were, but I remember I had them. And that makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.

If I had a couple Kairos moments during the day, I call it a success.

Carpe a couple of Kairoses a day.

Good enough for me.

Wee mail!

If you're ever pregnant, you MUST download this awesome app for your smart phone: wee mail.

It basically gives you a sarcastic message every day from your unborn child. Pretty hilarious, but a sense of humor is definitely needed!

Here's my message from the fetus thus morning:

At 6 months, I'm about the size of a Chicago hot dog. Insert wiener jokes here.

Love it!!!

Fun fact!

If the amount of crazy kicking Baby Boy L is currently doing in the womb is any indication of his future level of activity once born, the hubby and I are in trouble. Serious trouble.

However, this kicking hasn't gotten old yet, so kick, baby, kick! :)